It appears that we all agree that “passing the baton” is the next necessary step for our older generation to take.  Knowing and saying that is one thing; doing it is another.  It is difficult to accomplish such a task if we have not related well to the younger generation.  Thus, I would personally place the bulk of this relating responsibility on the older (chronologically or more mature in the Lord) women to reach out and be available. If we don’t have a legacy to pass on, where is our success??  If we don’t have successors, how has our life been one that impacts others?  Do the younger women see something in us that they even want?  When they want to know and are in a situation where they need to know, we will most likely be heard the best.  No words, however, will be heard if our heart attitude is not one of love, and that will quickly be picked up.  If our younger generation knows that we love them, respect them, and genuinely want them to succeed, they will be more apt to “listen to what we have to say”, which brings up another point.  When we talk do people even listen?  Have we ourselves gained the respect of our younger generation?

All of those questions seem important as we dive into such a challenge.  An important realization is that both of us have something to give – we need to always remain in a teachable position – again, that can be picked up by those with whom we relate.  If our attitude is one of knowing it all and having it all together, we don’t come across as very approachable.  Thus, sharing our struggles as well as victories becomes important, too – we learn from both.  We, as older sisters, really do have a wealth to share, but again, how it comes across is critical.  Our heart attitude shows through like nothing else and supersedes our words.  Thus, taking the younger women with us in our ministry can be so valuable as we find answers together, work together, and of course, pray together.  Our spirits can be so closely knit to one another as we involve ourselves more in the lives of the younger sisters.

Allowing the younger sisters to fail, do things their way and succeed, and being their biggest cheerleader can do more to boost confidence than all the teachings in the world.  As women, we have that motherly instinct to “protect” our sisters  from difficulty and conflict which might be the worst thing we can do for them.  We are doing them a great disservice, for if they fail, important life lessons can be learned.  If they succeed, important life lessons can also be learned.

We don’t need to “tell them” everything – let them experience their “wings in the Lord”.  Helping them to balance work and rest so as not to burn out; differentiating what is ministry and what isn’t; knowing when to say “no” and dealing with what people will think of them are just a few key areas where we might be of help – if asked.  This can insure our younger generation that they have something of worth to give and that we believe in them.

Being willing to learn from our younger sisters is also so very important – then we model the body of Christ – learning from one another and growing together.  If it’s only a one-way street, that will get old quickly.  We older sisters need to let the younger women know what we have learned from them and continue to help them to expect that we will learn.  An example of how a certain type of mountain goat functions can shed further light on the above.  When both a younger mountain goat and an older mountain goat are approaching the same path around the mountain from opposite directions, one of three things can happen.  They fight it out, and the winner passes; they go back from whence they came and neither gets completely around or…the older goat lies down and allows the younger goat to walk over him and get to the other side and then he gets up and proceeds to do the same and both get around the mountain.  I guess that I am expecting more from us older women, not necessarily in the area of doing, but in encouraging, helping, constructively criticizing, and in walking alongside.  Remember, just our “presence” at an event or teaching or whatever that a younger sister does or plans can speak volumes and accomplish much.

Another area worth touching on is the somewhat subtle/not so subtle difference in how the older and younger generational leaders deal with responsibilities and everyday life.  We can certainly learn from one another in this area also.  The older generation of leaders seemed to grow up on service and sacrifice which often resulted in overlooking one’s own fulfillment.  For example – for the most part most pastors/husbands were not that engaged in helping with the housework or doing much caring for the children thus freeing up the wife for other pursuits.  We didn’t know any differently or expect anything different.

That’s just how things were.  We often just accepted what we thought was true and didn’t question too much.  We were definitely our husband’s helpmate, but in a little different way – we did whatever was needed to totally free him to be all things to all people, so to speak.  Our younger leaders are stronger in communication, teamwork with their husbands, fulfilling and expressing their gifting – they expect to be a team with their husbands at home and at church – communicating openly, and wanting to be all they can be.  We both have the same hearts, but how we flesh life out does not necessarily look the same.  Thus, we need to understand from whence we both are coming, learn from each others’ victories and defeats, and pass on the legacy that incorporates the years of body life which we have lived.  It is important that we pass on a united front to our children and grandchildren.  They need to not see us at odds with one another, but gleaning from each other and, in love, serving one another.

Passing on the baton to the next generation is critical, but may we pass it in such a way that the next generation wants to receive it and considers it a privilege to do so.

Joanne Widener